I have been watching in horror the past (what has it been now?) 90 days to CNN covering the Oil Spill in the Gulf and I just can’t seem to get the idea out of my head “Holy shit! We’re all fucked!”

FIN has noticed a decrease in Oyster sales by nearly 70% in the past 3 months. Considering a large portion of our Oysters come from  Louisiana oyster beds it’s fair to say the reason for the decline is very obvious…

PEOPLE ARE AFRAID TO EAT CONTAMINATED SEAFOOD!!!

I get it, I do.

BUT…

WE MUST SUPPORT THESE DEVASTATED FARMERS!

Louisiana has been implementing unprecedented measures of inspections and testing to insure that we are getting pristine, OIL FREE, TOXIN FREE seafood.

Believe it or not, the first line of detection for considering a sample’s unlikely contamination is an inspectors NOSE!

Yes! These men and woman have been trained by smell, to detect even the faintest hint of oil. If they find the sample to smell “off” the sample is then sent to a lab for a series of tests to make a final determination.

Please, one way to help this already devastated economy in our “Low Country” is to support the continued buying of our southern seafood treats!

Hey! I ordered 12 Oysters the other day…and only 11 of them worked!

Think about it.

In the mean time:

SQUEAK SQUEAK!

My favorite time of year has to be when they open Copper River King Salmon season.

It represents the gateway to summer for me.

This is a pretty short season this year, I believe only two weeks, so I want you all to beware of the scams out there at your local markets.

Make sure you are asking if it is fresh or previously frozen before forking over anywhere between 25$ and 48$ a pound. Not that there is really anything wrong with PF fish, its just that some more dishonest stores may try to charge you fresh prices for the thawed out frozen product.

Which is super not cool!

The Kings this year a really big! Weighing in just around 30 lbs, so this is another thing to look for. The size of the fillet. If it looks like your average Atlantic Salmon sized fillet, you are being had.

Look for the fat seams of the fillet.

Copper River King Salmon is so good because of what?????

Fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why???????

Because FAT equals Flavor! Right????

Anyway, the color should be bright and beautiful. The fat, should be noticeable and WHITE!

If the Fillet has the milky white color that Salmon gets when it has been water logged…RUN. It most likely is old AND previously frozen.

Any questions?

It is a really big treat for you seafood lovers out there so, try and score yourself a piece or a pound. Then prepare it as simply as you can. Lightly sear it with some Asian Eel Sauce and serve it with some short grain sushi style rice and sauteed Spinach.

You will think you have died and gone to Salmon heaven!!!!

SQUEAK SQUEAK!!!

Holy shit!

I just found out that Georgina is dating the fucking bartender at SOLE!!!

WTF?!

She is such a traitorous bitch! No wonder she has been so fucking secretive about this “DUDE!”

The very idea that I have any knowledge about this guys pierced junk is beyond disgusting and borderlines mental warfare.

Ahhhh, this guy is good! VERY GOOD!

He infiltrates the enemy by way of desperate poon. Gotta give him credit for that one!

But the garbage incident by no way is forgiven! Kool Aid still needs to be escorted outside for a smoke by Delroy. (Since I can’t trust her to keep her pants on with Round Guy anymore).

I hear whisperings in the wind. My ear is low to the ground. I have dug myself a sweet fox hole and I intend on surviving.

Isn’t there a bit of choice blond meat over on the way side of the alley? Yes, yes I think there is.

I must investigate.

I will retaliate.

The jig is up!

What is going on here in the culinary world lately?

I had a friend arrive to town who is about the embark on a journey through (cough cough) culinary school, and while in a heated discussion about favorite classics that we both enjoy, I found out people are flash frying Confit.

What is Confit?

Simply put, it is a method the French used before refrigeration where meat was salted and cooked slowly while immersed in its own fat for several hours. Once the meat was fall off of the bone tender, the entire pot was left to cool down and as long as the fat seal that formed when cooled was not broken, the meat would be preserved until needed.

The most popular of items used for this cooking method is Duck, Pork or Goose.

Does anything about that sound CRISPY to you?

So I researched recipes on the web and sure enough, I could several for Pork Belly Confit and all of them called for frying the meat for a crispy crunch!

That is actually doing the exact opposite of confiing. That is rendering the fat OUT of the meat!

Oh fuck it!

New RULE!!! Stop being stupid,  all of you bloggers out there that think they are some sort of authority on food because you like to cook.

Oh, and there is no such thing as a Tomato Bisque….but that is for a later day!

SQUEAK SQUEAK!!! (and I need it)

More like “Cuts through butter like a HOT knife!”

That’s what I find it feels like when I use my awesome new Sushi knife I bought from a Japanese guy on Ebay.

This thing is super sharp and ready to slice and dice about anything I put under it.

Including my finger.

Is it bad luck if I happened to slice the tip of my finger off while stirring my coffee with my dick?

Maybe I should ask Chef…he seems to know all about this stuff.

And who’s brilliant idea was it to give that diseased ho bag ANGELA a platform to speak her mind?

HUH????

This is all beginning to be a bunch of bullshit! Adrienne is no where to be found for like a month, I mean she started this whole thing and was supposed to help us. No one is even writing about food. If anyone at all is even reading this shit.

I’m sure no one is interested in GEORGINA’s ball shaving butt-fucker boyfriend and his piercings.

We all need to get back to what we need to accomplish here. We need to get back to what we know… and we at FIN know IS FOOD!

Can we all just put together some kick ass recipes?

Georgina…Can you keep your pants on for one night and get your ass back into the kitchen mind set?

You used to be so focused.

Chef….When was the last time you spent anytime with Round Guy, Sam or Kool Aid?

Manny is cool n’ all but shit…There are other people who craze and vie for your attention.

What the fuck!

Never mind….

OH YEAH, HAPPY 4-20 people!

SQUEAK SQUEAK!!!

Just a simple question, really.

Why are all crazies, psychos, idiot savants,creeps, sociopaths and serial killers in movies named Henry?

Can someone please answer me that?

I mean, is it a given that a person sired this name, is doomed to be hanging from the rafters or wearing their dead mother’s dress eventually?

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer…. case in point

Henry from Eraserhead…. umm, yeah nothing like a nightmare yielding guy that promotes stomping on uteri to give Henry a good name. However I dig his hair and have to say that counts for something.

Henry Hill? Now he wasn’t even made up or anything but he was still a murdering mobster and for years people have called me Hendry as a direct result of Goodfellas.

Henry Fool…now that’s just cruel (even though it is an awesome movie) This guy had such delusions of grandeur that he took everyone down with him. I would never do such things…I’m just fucking awesome.

Ah shit….so now that I have brought it up, think about it.

Should you have been named Henry?

While everyone else is bitching about his wang or her thang, I’m going to just plug along and talk about what I know.

AND WHAT I KNOW IS SEAFOOD!!!

I hear so many people asking me how to prepare fish.

“Give me some good fish recipes, Henry!”

The wonderful thing about seafood and fish is that the less you do to it…the better.

Let me repeat that seafood tip

THE LESS YOU DO TO YOUR SEAFOOD AND FISH…THE BETTER!

Simple, fresh and fragrant should be the guide you use to make a spectacular dish.

I rarely bake fish. I rarely bread fish.

What I do is marinade, grill, sear or saute fish.

Fresh herb, fresh produce and quite frankly either butter or olive oil is all you need.

Seafood loves acidic flavors too like lime, lemon and vinegars, so a perfect answer to any piece of fish is a simple home-made vinaigrette.

Try a simple piece of fresh Rainbow Trout for example. Saute the fish in a pan with a little butter, sprinkle a little fresh thyme, salt and pepper on that bad boy and cook until nice and golden on the flesh side. Then put that on top of some farm fresh roasted fingerling potatoes that have been tossed in olive oil and garlic,  add a few tender stalks of steamed asparagus and then drizzle with a sun dried tomato vinaigrette and you my friend have  made yourself a dish that would cost you over 20 bucks in a place such as Fin.

“Keep is simple stupid”, is a favorite saying of mine.

Vinaigrettes are the key… they are simple, light and fast.

Try it

SQUEAK SQUEAK!

Since the turn in the weather, there seems to be a push for all things Spring cleaning at FIN

Cleaning house- a few people got shit canned this week.

Clearing air- I seem to be constantly offending and having to mend my damage.

Making room for the new- I hear there may be a few more additions at FIN, not sure how I feel about that.

But, I wanted to just say…are we not just a fucking restaurant? Does it always have to be such drama? Can’t I just go to work and pump out some awesome food?

I hate drama!

What I love, is to cook.

I am going to try again and disengage from the troubles across the alley. I am going to focus on my food and the fact that fishing season is nearly upon us.

I am going to do some spring cleaning of my soul and throw out the negative and welcome in the positive.

oh, but I do have my eye on the new little waitress they hired.

I may be Zen, but I’m not dead!!!

Such wild happenings and restaurant stories to get everyone caught up on.

Fin has been in an all out battle with SOLE  for the past few days. What I had hoped would happen on the plate, actually transpired in the alley. They had it coming to them though, that I can say honestly.

Chef lost it on some punk busser from next door who had the ever popular idea of throwing their old bags of garbage onto our back door and well, basically wherever it would land after a weak launch.

Unfortunately for the busser, Chef caught him in the act.

Let’s just say he is lucky to be able to tell the tale today. While the police were taking reports from onlookers, I happened to glance over in Angela’s direction. Seeing her all excited with chest heaving gave me an unexpected flashback and an even more unexpected hard on.

I admit, I did hear the song of the Fin Siren once….ok, twice.

They were just drunken booty calls. (can’t we figure out a better name for those?)

All I really remember about the encounters was her toned bald body. I mean, totally hairless except for her head.

I remember that, and her telling me “You won’t be the same after you’ve had all of this” as she waved her finger as if to point out her good spots.

Whatever, just as I expected.

I am the same, I don’t even remember much…pretty forgettable. Those kinda girls usually are. They think just looking at them is enough of a turn on, why bother making an effort? I prefer the underdog girls that work really hard at giving you exactly what you want.

I’ve got some new Lent ideas for ya, I’ll throw them up later.

Cool?

SQUEAK SQUEAK???

Anyone?

Anyone?

What’s up with David Letterman’s Moose Knuckle tonight!

I can’t get past it!

Late Night with David Letterman and his freakishly fitted trousers?

Was it always there and I just didn’t notice?

Help me out here!